Have you ever been gracious enough to your children that, you gave them the last double chocolate muffin? (the good ones and, they were on 50% off) Well, I was today..

I always generally cut one muffin in half for the two kids because sometimes they are just wasteful and if they want more, I will cut another! Today, I cut the muffin in half, expecting for it to be devoured because it was a double chocolate chip muffin right? WRONG. SO. WRONG!! Sometimes my kids can be so good, sweet and cute then other times they are just little satanic demons.

I figured since we were all sitting at the kitchen table things would be smooth sailing and they just proved me wrong the moment I sat down at my laptop (thinking of what to make my blog post about).

It started with both their cups of milk, E’s cup has a lid but that doesn’t stop her from making a mess. L seems to be doing fine, chugging along like Thomas the Train with his milk and you assume he finished it.. WRONG AGAIN MOM! “The muffin tried a jump over my milk, mom” was the response I received after asking why there was milk everywhere and no cup to be seen (again, I am sitting right in front of them MIND BLOWN because I can literally see everything that is happening).

I get off of my chair to bend over and pick up the cup that was involved in the muffin pole-vaulting contest, when I return…

There is literally micro-muffin pieces EVERYWHERE! I honestly didn’t think that muffins could be powdered after they were already cooked. Luckily enough, E didn’t rub the muffin all throughout her blonde hair… Today anyways.

In the fifteen seconds I took my eyes off of the table, there was a muffin explosion and it was probably the worst I have seen from my two mess makers. There is no photo evidence because between the dog and me running to get the vacuum, the mess didn’t last very long. I was also a little bit angry about the scale of mess that had been made, L stops and dead ass stares in me in face and says, “Clean up the floor right now!” for real.

I pondered what it would be like with one child for a second after giving one to the circus but, I realized.. I worked to damn hard for him and he is just like his mother so I cannot get mad.

Moral of this story, just save the last muffin for yourself.